Day 1 : grounded for a year
Today i woke up at 8:51am.. couldn't sleep after that cos i kept wondering about how fat i was for wanting to eat cake.... felt really bad.. sigh..
couldn't sleep very well last night.. had just gotten grounded for going to dandy.. mum told.. she full on ratted on me! she took me there and told dad everything! she even told my big brother that i had a bellybutton piercing and also that i was getting 4 piercings on the ears yesterday.. couldn't sleep cos i got the piercings on both ears. so had to sleep face up. and whenever i subconsciously rolled to the side.. it hurts a lot so i have to sleep face up ==" not too bad though :P
woke up.. turned on the computer and watched Rookies the movie :P its too sappy for my taste these days.. loved the drama and shiz but yeah :/ prob outgrown it xD
after that i watched Heroes and finished season 4.. on to the last season (nooo!!)
after that i started getting hungry and as soon as i get off my chair my mum calls me.. wtf annoying hag. i told her later to make me something to eat. which was my only meal for the whole day. since i was pretty depressed.. and who can blame me?! i got grounded for a whole fucking year for disobeying my dad once! yeah great and as soon ass holidays started. you have no idea how sad and frustrated i am. all my plans all out the window just cos my mum couldn't lie. and not even! she insisted on taking me then ratted on me. i don't understand!! and she blames it on me for going there in the first place! i don't get it! only once i've defied him. and i have to get such a harsh punishment. i am so unhappy and no one can save me from this. not even my close friends. so insensitive.. even when i am always there for them. they are never there for me. or just can't seem to be good at cheering me up...at all.. not even jdramas can pick me up from this hellhole.. but ima pretend to stay strong. and block out all these feelings from now on.. since nothing will change.. i will always be in this situation until next year. so i must get used to this sadness so then i can block it out and to make it never let me cry again :)must numb this sadness must numb this sadness must numb this sadness...i will be fine. i just have to be me ... or to put this fake mask on.
i believe.. it's not wrong to starve. it actually makes me feel better..kind of xD cos i can see that i look cuter xD so all good for me hehe xP
what the hell am i supposed to do for 2 weeks i wonder? hmmmmm...